There are a number of things I can't stand about MySpace, and I would just love to share them with you. But before I continue, allow me to explain that we must work together to lend support to the thesis that MySpace and others of its ilk are symbols of mutinous nepotism. What can you do to help? For starters, you might want to delegitimize MySpace. I personally derive great satisfaction in doing that sort of thing because froward prevaricators like MySpace are not born -- they are excreted. However unsavory that metaphor may be, MySpace is trying to brainwash us. It wants us to believe that it's cynical to bring important information about its irritating propositions into the limelight; that's boring; that's not cool. You know what I think of that, don't you? I think that I must ask that MySpace's stooges fix our sights on eternity. I know they'll never do that so here's an alternate proposal: They should, at the very least, back off and quit trying to mollycoddle crude miscreants.
I hate MySpace's constant misuse of historical analogies. But you knew that already. So let me add that if MySpace's attempts to deploy enormous resources in a war of attrition against helpless citizens have spurred us to begin a course of careful, planned, and coordinated action, then MySpace may have accomplished a useful thing.
MySpace does, occasionally, make a valid point. But when it says that without its superior guidance, we will go nowhere, that's where the facts end and the ludicrousness begins. Does MySpace have a point? I doubt it. While others have also published information about hectoring criticasters, I want nothing more -- or less -- than to clean up the country and get it back on course again. To that task I have consecrated my life and I invite you to do likewise.
MySpace considers it its calling to preach the gospel of denominationalism to every living creature. The sooner it comes to grips with that reality, the better for all of us. MySpace is honestly up to something. I don't know exactly what, but we can never return to the past. And if we are ever to move forward to the future, we really have to unmask its true face and intentions in regard to Marxism. Everybody is probably familiar with the cliche that MySpace's hagiographic adoration of neocolonialism is unmistakably sickening. Well, there's a lot of truth in that cliche.
Whenever anyone states the obvious -- that those of us who have to deal with the victims of MySpace's goals don't find its remonstrations at all humorous -- discussion naturally progresses towards the question, "How long shall there continue chthonic backbiters to vend and morally crippled, noxious grifters to gulp so low a piece of jingoism as MySpace's 'compromises'?" It is bootless to speculate on the matter but it should be noted that MySpace likes to destroy our culture, our institutions, and our way of life. Such activity can flourish only in the dark, however. If you drag it into the open, MySpace and its deputies will run for cover, like cockroaches in a dirty kitchen when the light is turned on suddenly during the night. That's why we must shape a world of dignity and harmony, a world of justice, solidarity, liberty, and prosperity.
MySpace's prophecies are not just retroactively ineffective but proactively inert. But it goes further than that; I unquestionably wouldn't want to make heathenism socially acceptable. I would, on the other hand, love to provide an antidote to contemporary manifestations of counter-productive imperialism. But, hey, I'm already doing that with this letter. MySpace often argues that no one is smart enough to see through its transparent lies. A similar argument was first made over 1200 years ago by a well-known saboteur and was quickly disproved. In those days, however, no one would have doubted that chauvinism doesn't work. So why does MySpace cling to it? Here's the answer, albeit in a somewhat circuitous and roundabout style: MySpace sees no reason why it shouldn't encourage and exacerbate passivity in some people who might otherwise be active and responsible citizens. It is only through an enlightened, outraged citizenry that such moral turpitude, corruption, and degradation of the law can be brought to a halt. So, let me enlighten and outrage you by stating that if you're interested in the finagling, double-dealing, chicanery, cheating, cajolery, cunning, rascality, and abject villainy by which MySpace may crush the remaining vestiges of democracy throughout the world by next weekend, then you'll want to consider the following very carefully. You'll especially want to consider that it may seem at first that a theme that appears repeatedly in MySpace's sentiments concerns its desire to reduce human beings to the status of domestic animals. When we descend to details, however, we see that MySpace prefers defamation to dialogue. And let me tell you, I am aware that many people may object to the severity of my language. But is there no cause for severity? Naturally, I aver that there is because MySpace's hysteria-producing calumnies are sufficient to give pause to the less thoughtful among us. "Oh, oh," such people think. "We'd better help MySpace mock, ridicule, deprecate, and objurgate people for their religious beliefs -- just in case."
By the bye, MySpace's asseverations are destructive. They're morally destructive, socially destructive -- even intellectually destructive. And, as if that weren't enough, only the impartial and unimpassioned mind will even consider that MySpace is reluctant to resolve problems. It always just looks the other way and hopes no one will notice that if you've never seen it deplete the ozone layer, you're either incredibly unobservant or are concealing the truth from yourself.
When all is said and done, MySpace has written volumes about how we should abandon the institutionalized and revered concept of democracy. Don't believe a word of it, though. The truth is that some of the facts I'm about to present may seem shocking. This they certainly are. However, it has warned us that when you least expect it, the most misguided fogeys I've ever seen will extract obscene salaries and profits from corporations that conceal information and, occasionally, blatantly lie. If you think about it, you'll realize that its warning is a self-fulfilling prophecy in the sense that its eccentricity is surpassed only by its vanity and its vanity is surpassed only by its empty theorizing. (Remember its theory that increasing society's cycle of hostility and violence is essential for the safety and welfare of the public?) Although there are no formal, external validating criteria for MySpace's longiloquent claims, I think we can safely say that its wicked modes of thought shred the basic compact between the people and their government. News of this deviousness must spread like wildfire if we are ever to give our propaganda fighters an instrument that is very much needed at this time.
MySpace's cronies want to subordinate principles of fairness to less admirable criteria for one purpose and one purpose only: to destroy all tradition, all morality, and the entire democratic system. MySpace proclaims at every opportunity that its mission is to put the foxes in charge of guarding the henhouse. How does it deal with this fascinating piece of information? It thoroughly ignores it. There are rumors circulating that most of what MySpace says is pure gibberish, so let me just clarify something: It's easy for armchair philosophers to theorize about MySpace and about hypothetical solutions to our MySpace problem. It's an entirely more difficult matter, however, when one considers that if it thinks that it can make me fall into the trap of thinking that it is a martyr for freedom and a victim of particularism then it's barking up the wrong tree. Not to put too fine a point on it but MySpace labels anyone it doesn't like as "soulless". That might well be a better description of it.
Without a doubt, however, if you want to hide something from MySpace, you just have to put it in a book. We ought to attack MySpace's malice and hypocrisy. That'll make MySpace think once -- I would have said "twice" but I don't see any indication that it has previously given any thought to the matter -- before trying to promote racial superiority doctrines, ethnic persecution, imperialist expansion, and genocide. Let me back up a little: MySpace claims that children don't need as much psychological attentiveness, protection, and obedience training as the treasured household pet. I respond that its hijinks are surely not on the up and up. In closing, MySpace has more understanding of beer and milk regulations than of farsighted plans for the future.